My mom told me today that maybe I should just leave Japan and go home … Maybe it is the right thing to do since everything seems to fall apart here. Japan is far from paradise you know … It’s becoming hell to me actually … I need to breath, and for sure I need peace . Anyway thank you mum for telling me that it isn’t my fault. I needed to hear that. Really. I...
It's been 2 years today.
Thank you for not even being able to keep your promise and having a nice dinner with me, it was just our birthday, after all, nothing that really matters. We had a reservation, but this too doesn’t matter right? What have I become? What has my life become? I feel just alone, lost and betrayed. Thank you for all of this.
I’m going crazy here. This is beyond everything. Hate took love’s place. There is no trust anymore. Suspicion, lies. Mind are poisoned. As are hearts. There is no way back I think. We won’t be happy again anymore. Being together was a mistake, we can’t make it that’s obvious. I don’t even have strength enough to cry. My life is a ruin. I’m not...
今日は一人ぼっちな感じで、 さみしい。 明日、スポーツクラブ行けたらいいね。運動すると悩みをちょっと忘れるって気がするね。
some-faith: Tupac - Changes
The song I’m listening all day
Today for the 1st time of my life I went to the sports club near my work. To me just going there was a victory. Because I’m finally able to stand and move for what I want. I forgot my too many complex and worked out 2 hours. I’ve never done any sports in my life until now so it was kind of hard, but you know now I feel tired, I feel pain also, but I’m also full with hope....
好きな人が泣くと 「うるさいよ。静かにしろう」 っていう人なんかいないでしょ？ 酷いでしょ？ それとも、私が泣いてる奴だから、 私が悪い？ もう意味が分からない。 愛なんてこんなことか？ そうなら要らないよ。 帰りたいよ、自分の居場所に。
抱きしめて欲しい、 安心させて欲しい、 甘えて欲しい、 仲良くして欲しい、 優しくされて欲しい、 愛されて欲しい。